Archive for October, 2011
Lame Costume Ideas for the Truly Desperate
Oct 29th
Bubble World
Coming in July 2013 from Henry Holt
If you are searching for costume ideas on the Saturday before Halloween — a.k.a. The Biggest Party Night of the Year — you need to accept that your costume will be, if not lame, then . . . never mind. Your costume is going to be lame. But going to a costume party in street clothes would be like wearing a sweater to a nudist camp, so here are some ideas to keep your from embarrassing yourself.
The one way to turn a less-than-original idea into a “Wow!” costume is by thinking through ever detail, like these people did. But you don’t have time for that.
Cowboy and saloon girl
Cowboy is the default costume for men who don’t like to dress up. If you’ve got denim or white overalls, you can expand into farmer or painter territory — but then, if you’re an overall-owning guy, you’ve probably got the dressing-up thing under control. As for the saloon girl, isn’t it cool how my friend reconstructed a thrift shop dress?? You so don’t have time for that. But if you have a moderately skanky-yet-pouffy dress, fishnet stockings, and a feather for your hair, you can throw something together. If nothing else, your costume will be a conversation piece.
“What in god’s name are you supposed to be?”
“A saloon girl. I got the idea from the Internet.”
“Awesome.”
Biker and Naughty Schoolgirl
Leather vest or coat. Tattoo “sleeves” from a Halloween store (or real ones if you’re so inclined — but then this won’t look like much of a costume). Bandanna. Earring (real or fake).
For the schoolgirl (that’s me, by the way; I was younger then): Plaid skirt. White shirt (that you don’t mind having wine spilled on). Vest or tie (I should have had them). Knee socks. Black bra that shows through the white shirt. And — this is key — a tramp stamp, fake or real (see above) that you expose half way through the party when you tie up your little white shirt.
Pirate
Pirate costumes were big, big, big the year “The Pirates of the Caribbean” came out. You’re not going to pull off Jack Sparrow; don’t even try. But with a bandanna on your head, a parrot on your shoulder, a vest, a plastic sword . . . that’ll do, pig. (If you didn’t get that movie reference — no offense intended; move on.)
Vampire
I am not including this picture of the coolest vampire costume ever to make you feel bad about showing up at a party in a black cape and fangs. Okay, maybe I am.
Spooky
I don’t do spooky. But these people did and they creeped me the hell out. One advantage of going spooky is that there are no rules: face paint, fake blood, weird masks, weird hair, weird clothes . . . you can wear anything as long as it’s creepy. The other advantage, if you want, is anonymity. I re-met the second of these spookies at a barbecue six months after this Halloween party, and I had no idea who they were.
More Last Minute Ideas:
Mime: Striped shirt. White face paint. Easy. Bonus: you don’t have to make small talk.
Flasher: Trench coat.
Columbo: Flasher with hat and cigarette.
John Belushi: Toga
More Costume Ideas:
The Best Halloween Costumes that You Never Thought Of
Halloween Costumes: Rockers and Pop Stars
Halloween Costumes: Television Shows
Halloween Costumes: In the News
The Best Halloween Costumes You Never Thought Of
Oct 28th
Bubble World
Coming in July 2013 from Henry Holt
Are you going to be a witch for Halloween? Or a pirate? Or a vampire? That’s wonderful! Have a super time! Now go away. This post isn’t for you.
But if you want something so original that no one ever thought of it before — well, except for my friends whose pictures I’ll post on the Internet without permission — here are some categories to get you thinking.
MYTHOLOGY
One year in college I was Medusa, complete with green face, toga, and rubber snakes in my hair. I felt way superior to all those coeds who dressed as kitty cats and French maids (for chrissake) until I started hitting the parties and discovered that boys prefer leotards to originality. So now I know. Of course, Greek and Roman mythology is filled with attractive characters (if you care about that kind of thing). Zeus has thick white locks and a thunderbolt. Athena has a little white dress and an arrow. They all wear super-cute shoes. How’s this for a couple’s costume: King Neptune and the Ocean.
CRIMINALS
No, you should not dress as Casey Anthony for Halloween! That’s just sick and wrong and . . . sick. And wrong. So stop googling “Casey Anthony Halloween costumes,” people! (Yes, I have Google Analytics. Yes, it tells me these things. I also know your name, your social security number, what you called your first pet and what you like on your pizza.)
If taste is a factor, you’re better off going retro criminal: Bonnie and Clyde, Whitey Bulger, D.B. Cooper. and Jesse James (no, not Sandra’s ex — though he wouldn’t be bad, either — and you can pick up some realistic looking tattoo “sleeves” at any Halloween store).
HISTORICAL FIGURES
What? You never studied the importance of the twirler in American History? Yeah, okay — my husband and I couldn’t come up with a couples costume that year, so “tall hats” was our unifying theme. Aside from Abraham Lincoln, other costume-worthy presidents include George Washington, Teddy Roosevelt, and Richard Nixon.
Don’t limit your ideas to American figures. Che Guevara and Fidel Castro, anyone? The costumes are warm — and you get to smoke cigars, if you like that sort of thing. If you prefer singing to smoking, you can always go the Eva Peron route. And it’ll be really funny ten years from now when your friends are still talking about that time you got really drunk and sang “Don’t Cry for Me, Argentina.” Especially if you’ve got kids around to hear about it.
If you run through democracies and revolutionaries and dictators and still can’t come up with something, you can always go royal. Louis the XIV (you can wear platform shoes). Marie Antoinette (don’t forget to bring cake). And those English monarchs are always up for a good time. Party on, Queen Elizabeth I! And speaking of hats, Queen Elizabeth II is ripe with possibilities.
ARTISTS
Andy Warhol! How clever is that? (Che Guevara got a rockin’ makeover.) You could do all kinds of things with Vincent VanGogh: blue smock; missing ear, palette. And don’t forget the literary luminaries: Zelda and F. Scott Fitzgerald, Ernest Hemingway, Dorothy Parker, Virginia Woolf, Charles Dickens . . . William Shakespeare!
Wow. Once upon a time, writers led such exciting lives. But now we get to blog, so . . . yay for progress.
More Costume Ideas:
Halloween Costumes: Rockers and Pop Stars
Halloween Costumes: Television Shows
Halloween Costumes: In the News
Lame Costume Ideas for the Truly Desperate
Halloween Costumes: Rockers and Pop Stars
Oct 25th
Bubble World
Coming in July 2013 from Henry Holt
The difference between rock stars and you: THEY dress like this every day, and YOU realize it’s all a bunch of silly make-believe, best saved for late October. Oh, yeah — and most of them sing way better than most of you do.
I’m not the type to pit my friends against each other in terms of “best” and “worst” costumes (I’ll pit them against each other for other reasons), but one of the best costumes ever? EVER? Was Courtney Love, circa Halloween 2006. Courtney didn’t just come complete with smeared eye and lip makeup, she stayed in character the entire evening, butting to the front of the bar line (“Courtney wants a DRINK!”), yelling at “Kurt,” and generally pissing people off. I loved her!
Other classic rock couples? Elvis Presley and Priscilla, of course . . .
Is it just me? Or do Elvis and Priscilla bear a remarkable resemblance to Kate and Jon Gosselin?
What other rock or pop stars would make good couple costumes? Let. Me. Think.
Hey! Did I ever mention that my husband and I were Britney Spears and Kevin Federline one year? Here: I’ll post a picture. Cuz I want to help you like visualize and stuff.
Other costume-worthy singers: Lady Gaga, Katy Perry, and Madonna. Go back a ways, and you’ve got ZZ Top, Abba, Bee Gees, Josie & the Pussycats, Michael Jackson . . . and Madonna. (For Halloween, you definitely want to go “early Madonna,” because when else can you wear a pointy black bra in public? Then again, “late Madonna” means you get to speak in a bad British accent and chuck hydrangeas at people.)
Finally, you can’t go wrong with KISS! Well, unless you have sensitive skin.
And finally (finally) . . . let’s not forget the original “every day is Halloween” band: The Village People! But if you show up at a party dressed this way? You’d better be ready to dance in formation.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rFv5DRp_7Ss
More Costume Ideas:
The Best Halloween Costumes You Never Thought Of
Halloween Costumes: Television Shows
Halloween Costumes: In the News
Lame Costume Ideas for the Truly Desperate
Halloween Costumes: Movies
Oct 22nd
Bubble World
Coming in July 2013 from Henry Holt
Hooray for Hollywood! In addition to the Zone diet, lip injections, over-sized sunglasses, and the Arquettes, Hollywood has given us movies. Where better to search for costumes than in the land of make-believe? And who better to inspire you for the creepiest of holidays than Alfred Hitchcock. Yup, that’s Tippi Hedren from “The Birds” and Norman Bates from “Psycho.”
Want to cross-dress without getting scary? There’s always “Hairspray.” If it’s good enough for Travolta . . .
Of course, if you’re looking to tune in to your inner Travolta, you can always go for his “Saturday Night Fever” look, or you could be Danny from “Grease.” Plus, wasn’t he an angel once? “Michael,” maybe? In fact, you could have an entire John Travolta-themed party, where everyone dressed as one of his characters!!!! Or not.
Next up, scary movies! Okay — more scary movies. I already did Hitchcock. But frankly? I’m busy here and don’t have time for that thing known as “organization.”
“Nightmare on Elm Street”: Freddy Krueger never gets old. (Actually, he does.) Way more original: “A Nightmare Before Christmas.”
Don’t forget about kids movies: “Toy Story,” “The Incredibles,” “The Wizard of Oz,” any classic Disney film. And don’t be afraid to add your own twist. I, for one, would love to see Ariel the little mermaid gone bad.
More Ideas:
Halloween Costumes: In the News
Halloween Costumes: Television Shows
Halloween Costumes: Rockers and Pop Stars
The Best Halloween Costumes You Never Thought Of
Lame Costume Ideas for the Truly Desperate
The Best Character Names
Oct 21st
This is the day you’ve been waiting for: when I finally stop blogging about baby names and get back to things that really matter. Like Halloween costumes.
Yes, it’s time to give away a $50 Barnes & Noble gift card, and we have a winner (courtesy of a free random-choice web program that I sure hope didn’t give my computer a virus). Congratulations to Melissa of Austin, TX!
What? You, gentle blog reader, didn’t win? Don’t feel bad: lots and lots of other people didn’t win, either, which is how these random choice things work. But! I have two more books to give away to the two people who sent in names that, when combined, created what I felt was the best character name . . . or, more specifically, a character name that would work in my next book (which hasn’t been announced yet but is scheduled for a Spring 2012 release).
If you haven’t received an email from me, then, um — well, you didn’t win this, either. But maybe you’ll see one of your submissions on this list of runners up. And that’s almost as good as winning, right? Right?
The Best Character Names (Honorable Mention)
| GIRLS
Zada Grace Summer Sonora Pemberley Reede Penelope Todd Jane Grayson Audrey Rayne Pearl Adair Nadine Vondell |
BOYS
Odysseus Grant Brutus Cash Seth Sergio Royce Camden Sawyer Stone Marley Owen Trenton Truitt Vincent Stephanos |
And the winner is . . . Allegra Trip.
Thanks to Lisa of Knoxville, TN, for the Allegra and Krystyna of Saint Cloud, MN (which has got to be the best town name), for the Trip.
In her submission, Lisa made it clear that “Allegra” was inspired by Lord Byron’s daughter, not the allergy medication. Thanks, Lisa. I’ll keep that in mind.
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